Why John Isn't Gay

Thanks go today to TSylvestris for writing a story with purpose, in the form of the short fanfic  'Why John Isn't Gay', and writing it so well.

The author TSylvestris is right; realising that love isn't neatly sortable by gender - not your own nor that of your soulmate(s) - is a tough journey, and can be a lengthy and challenging one. Personally I concluded most recently that I am simply 'humano-sexual'. I love people for their souls, not for the flesh-clothing they are wearing or for how they accessorise or label that flesh. It's taken over half a lifetime to work it out, though. I guess the next bit is learning to love myself for the soul I have, too, regardless of my own flesh-clothing, labels and accessories...

I'd like to sign-post people to the ''You Will Rise Project' as well as to the Trevor Project and to It Gets Better. I don't want to just support young people who are struggling to come to terms with the idea that sexuality isn't a binary thing. Older people run into the same sorts of issues when suddenly they realise they are not who they thought they were and that love just got more complex than they ever expected. I'm proud (in all senses of the word) to say that my own city is trying to address this, through the LGF. I want to also urge people who happen to be feeling the age barrier in their journey to their authentic selves to stick with the trip, too.

It's also worth thinking about the idea that sometimes the journey matters, too, not just the destination. My own evolution has been lengthy and complex and not always nice to have to live through. Living through it means you get to feel the elation of coming out the other side, though. You also get to be with the people your life is truly about meeting, including your 'authentic self*'.

And there is an end to every tunnel, even if it's night outside of it and so you can't see the light at the end right now; just please give yourself the chance to keep on walking down the tracks 'til you get there, cos if you give up while you are still in the dark you will be leaving the person who is waiting for you at the end of the tunnel alone, to always wonder where you went and why you never met up with them.



*My interpretation of 'authentic self' is 'the core being (person) you were before other people's values and agendas messed with your head; the person we are all travelling back towards being'.


This entry is dedicated to 'Silver', to 'Daniel' and to Jessie, with gratitude and eternal love and hope.
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P.S. I'd like also to recommend the story 'Seems so Easy for Everyone Else', by etothepii, where similar but different issues are addressed. The recommendation for this story is dedicated to MistressHeather, Scrimshaw and Luvbnd.
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